The reason brides try to revert back to their former, unachievable, high school-skinny selves is so the photos will last a lifetime look smashing. Please, do not lie and pretend that you're dieting for something superficial like your health. Women diet to look good.
As a woman, it's come to my attention that, while I'm (for once) a desirable weight, there are some loose ends (specifically, mine).
There are many courses of action to rectify this problem. Some brides employ a personal trainer to assist them in their Jello-to-hello! quest. I'm too poor. So, today, I invented a diet.
My new diet is called: drop half your food on the floor diet. This diet came to me as I was eating a York patty in my car after stopping by CVS during lunch (mmm...nutritious errands). Half the patty sat on my thigh (ironically, not a deterrent), and as I turned the corner, the patty slid off of my leg and into the crevice between the seat and the console. Balls. When I finally removed the patty, it was covered in lint and God-knows what. Que disappointment.
The pitfalls of this diet are of course that you'll quickly not be welcomed back into restaurants once they realize you throw half of your dinner to the ground.
My other diet idea is called Pavlov's Diet. The success of this diet is contingent on you training yourself to run every time you smell food. Admittedly, I feel that running one's self to death might occur in extreme cases.
Okay, so personally devising a diet plan---not always the best idea, but hey, it's a start.
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